Spiritual Advance

Love holds no grievances

Tag: Suffering


Based on ACIM workbook lesson 6:
I am upset because I see something that is not there

O, how much longer suffering will last?
Day after day I am in pain severe
And through the future, in the past
The pain is always with me, always near.

At times like these I am unable seeing straight
I am so wrecked, forgetting all I learn
And all I see in you is anger, hate,
And seeing thus in hell I burn.

But time does heal, and so I wait –
The ones who’re cursed with ego self
Need time to heal the burning hate,
Need time to end this endless hell.

And so I wait, and so I learn –
I look at you and try to find
What did I find in you to mourn?
How did I see in day the night?

I am upset because I saw the lies
I looked at you, but found still burning hate
Through seeing thus my pure Self but dies
Through misperceiving I’m determining my fate.

Through seeing pain I am myself in pain –
I find in you what is in me.
Through making up the lies, I’m lost again –
Not seeing light in you, I cannot truly see.

My friend, be wise, learn from you see in me:
At times I’m lost, do not be fooled by that.
When I am lost in hate, I pray the hate you do not see,
Do learn from all mistakes I’ve made.

When I’m in pain, do not perceive the pain
But please remind me of the Truth
I need to learn, I need to hear again
Of teaching pure, pure use.

Oh yes, I hear you say: “Now wait,
You’re teaching me when you are lost yourself
Trying to show me love, I see your hate
You dare speaking of pure Self?”

Alas, this is mistake so easily have made,
But truly, there’s no hate in me.
Looking at me and seeing anguished hate
You have just destined this pure hate to be.

You are the master of this dream,
You will decide how you perceive –
By seeing you will love create or sin
And then yourself will this receive

I know the Truth, but knowing’s not enough
I’m learning still remembering to see
Each day much better I can see your love
But you can learn much faster, watching me.

Do you still hope to find salvation by yourself?
Do you still think that you’re apart from me?
We’re always one, even in seeming hell –
Before it ends, we must learn each as one to see.

And each mistake I’ve ever made
You have repeated at some time.
Each time you see in me the hate
It but reflects your own unreal crime.

The little voice

Based on workbook lesson 4:
These thoughts do not mean anything

As I indeed did think these thoughts,
As they consumed my very self,
As I cried loudly to the gods:
Why so am I condemned to hell?

What chanced upon my wretched soul
That I heard voice of gods impure?
How did it come that I’m not whole
And gods I hear are too obscure?

The thoughts that chanced upon my mind,
So very murky like the waters dead,
With these same thoughts I tried to find
Who does control my wretched head?

For through these thoughts I am controlled,
I did submit to voice of hell,
And through its saying hell unfolds
Never did I feel pain so well.

It shreds my mind, the voice in my own head,
It burns my soul through lies I hear thus.
The words so clear: “Ay, ‘tis that,
Listen to me, I dare you these words to cross!

I dare you not listen to my voice,
Which’s telling you the only truth.
In fear do submit to my own curse
From all the gods it’s me you have to choose.

Who else can show you way in life,
You wretched, puny little thing?
Who else can end your wicked strife?
But only me, who truth does bring”.

Indeed I listened, and believed –
The things were said that trapped me so.
Through many lies in my life I have lived,
But never I was taken down so low.

For years I listened to the ego thus.
Unknown back then it was to me,
How I the most important battle lost,
Condemning me the sin to see.

I did not know from where it came,
I did not see the voice as hell,
But listened to the curse upon my name –
My very soul almost did sell.

These very thoughts developed so
Through many lives, year after year,
I did not live – existed in a woe,
Unable to control this endless fear.

Yet pure God never condemns,
He never does forget His Son,
But waits for him to come to sense,
And learn how nonexistent sin’s undone.

My thoughts of hate brought me the pain,
Time after time I met the death,
And never knowing that my bane
Controlled my thinking, every breath.

Through suffering untold I learned of fear
And could not listen to the ego anymore.
Day after day the Truth was coming nearer,
I came so close to ego’s wicked lore,

That finally I realized
What did cause all the suffering in life –
Nothing tormented me, but ego’s lies,
Nothing condemned me else to strife.

True God I started hearing then,
As soon as ego went away.
I heard the Pure Voice exactly when
I realized the ego’s ways.

I understood that all those thoughts,
That ego taught me all the time,
Did not have any meaning, but did cause
All suffering I had all through my prime.

All through my life in hell believed,
Yet what is hell, but ego’s wicked voice?
In clouds and mud and mist I lived,
Until I finally have made the choice.

The choice each one, each brother needs to make
In order to undo all suffering and sin.
The choice that finally my Self did wake,
That finally allowed my true life to begin.

The Hunt

Based on Workbook Lesson 2:
I have given this all the meaning

The crowd:
“We’ve finally found it, wicked beast,
That we’ve been hunting for since birth.
It’s time for hate to be released
And end our eternal dearth –

Of peace, of worldly goods and things
That we are striving for, and yet
The beast creates all our sins
And feasts on sins we can’t forget,

Nor can forgive – they’re great indeed!
Created by the Satan’s lore,
Whom with our sins we nurse and feed –
But this can’t go on anymore!

The suffering is greater much,
Than fleeting high we feel at times –
It’s giving us our only crutch,
But then condemning us of crimes!

It dies now – we are on our own
And all the pleasures of this world
Then will be left for us alone
And our new life will unfold”.

The beast:
“Each sin in humans I perceive

I’ve made myself – all go to hell!
They will my suffering receive,
All are condemned in pain to dwell!

I am creator of the sin,
I am the one who’s made the hate,
So let the suffering begin –
All tools of torture I have made!

The way I still perceive myself,
As wretched demon, spawn of hell,
The way I plan to kill their Self…
But, wait – I think I hear the bell! –

They’re finally coming after me,
Trying to hunt the evil pure –
Such fools! – incapable to see:
The force, the fight my strength ensure!

For eons, I have ruled the world
My own creation, where I’m god!
Desires, thoughts and sins unfold
In every sinner – all are flawed!

How do they hope to kill what rules?
No one can live when I am dead!
Their lives are worthless – wicked fools,
How will they fight, when me they dread?

I cannot look but with disgust
At my own subjects insecure,
Sin is my own – they pay the cost
Damned all who’re caught in my allure!

They’re fools, but death I must delay –
There’s more control I’m striving for,
A tempting plan for them I’ll lay
Confusing them with my own lore.

As crowd has made its way up to the tower
Their rage and hatred grew, much more increased,
With hope approached, to bring about the hour,
To bring about demise of their own beast,

Of their creation, spawn of hell which feeds
On anger, rising in the crowd with force –
But fight of fire with fire nowhere leads –
Crowd’s hatred, pain and beast have the same source.

The crowd:
“Bring on the ram, break down the doors!
Let torches light up the whole tower!
Where wicked beast our pain prolongs,
Laying its plans for our devour!

Let’s force it out with smoke of rage,
With hatred bringing it to knees,
And lock it, bar it into cage
Where it can’t spread its own disease.

But look! – The beast leaves its own spire!
Ends here our quest of death so dire –
For long we grew such grave desire
Of our revenge – set beast on fire!”.

“No, we should wait, and let it speak –
Before it dies, let’s hear its words,
In fear it seems so lost and meek –
For now let’s lay aside our swords”.

The beast:
“My subjects, look, open your eyes!

The meaning of your lives is me!
Without me you are doomed, world dies!
Open your eyes – I’ll make you see!

This life seems difficult at times,
But the rewards you get from me!
And even when committing crimes,
Being merciful, I let you be.

The world you cherish is my own,
And yet I share it with you all
For who did put me on the throne,
After you’ve suffered your own fall?

I am protection from God’s wrath!
I am the mirror of your sins!
I am your ego, and our path
Holds us together, ‘ever clings”.

Thus ego spoke, and spoke at length,
While being vile, it’s just as sly,
Depends on blinded eyes its wicked strength,
But anger brings such blindness to one’s eye.

The hatred, guilt, shame, lust, desire,
The struggle, anxious search for one’s own peace,
Can’t lead to peace, but strengthen fire
With fuel of one’s own mental disease.

And so the tale of wicked sin goes on,
And all this meaning we’ve assigned ourselves
To worldly things we’re given on a loan –
Such meaning which corrupts us, overwhelms.

As long as we are willing to exchange
Our very Self and our own peaceful Truth
For ego’s wicked lies, made to derange,
The ego will continue its abuse.

Sonnets of Love – 20 (Stupidity)

Enormous, isn’t it – our stupidity –
To push away our life, the peace,
Accepting terror, saying no to Love.
And we submit to our timidity,
Afraid of looking where Truth is…
And we will suffer, ’till we say “enough”!

There is no world

There is no world – thus the main theme of A Course In Miracles can be summarized.

The ego gathers evidence to the contrary, day and night. The only goal the ego pursues is to prove to you that there is in fact a world. There is a universe and you’re a body. You live on earth and you have real needs. You have to honor needs, or else – you suffer, wither and die.

Everything is built around this theme in this world – there is virtually nothing and no one who helps you to see differently. It is a prison where prisoners imagine to be kings, and they will not allow a dissident to break free and show them the beauty behind the barbwire.

There is no world – you learn of this and now you know no better but to deny the world. Deny your bodily needs, deny the laws the ego set forth for you. But how can you deny something you don’t believe in?

Denying the ego is what makes it seemingly real. Your thought is what gave rise to this illusion, and the denial is yet another thought. Until you learn to give the world no thought at all, it will be there for you, tormenting you forever.

What does it mean to give no thought at all? It means to not judge. You see the world for what it is and you do not judge one thing to be better or worse, more or less special. While you are here your body has some needs – you fulfill them, but you do not seek your purpose in them. You continue to function – but with a gentle smile upon your face, forgiving the sin you know does not exist.


The ego wishes many things. It made you believe that body is all you have. It proves how real the body is by putting it through suffering and death. How can you argue with such evidence?

Having proved its case about the body, it is not difficult for the ego to convince you of many things the body needs. The ego wishes this or that, telling how you – the body – is incomplete without these things.

And yet, ego’s wishing is without power in reality. It affects you only if you are making it real. You’ve chosen to believe in ego’s idle wishes and it is power of your thought, mistakenly misplaced, that seems to make you suffer.

If you believe in suffering and death, you will certainly create them for yourself. And yet, by creating a perception you are still not making it real.

God wills. He does not wish. Your will is as powerful as His because it is His. The ego’s wishes do not mean anything, because the ego wishes for the impossible. You can wish for the impossible, but you can will only with God. This is the ego’s weakness and your strength. (T-7.X.4:6-11)

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